Today may be day sixteen, but it is also day fourteen of crappy weather. As in heat. I knew what I had signed up for when I planned this trip in the dead of summer, but this is ridiculous. The heat index in Philly today was 107 degrees. Combine that with a city that is made up of one way streets, and half of those streets are closed for repaving, and the GPS in your truck not understanding that I CANNOT go that way, and last but not least, having to pay $16 in tolls just to drive from Baltimore to Philadelphia, and it all adds up to a somewhat crappy day. To top it off, we stopped at a McDonald’s (not my first choice, but seriously, this city has no parking anywhere), only to find out that they RAN OUT OF KETCHUP! No ketchup for my fries. What the HELL is this world coming to?
It wasn’t all bad, but it was pretty close. We drove to Philly (and paid our $16 in toll fees), and our first stop was the Mutter Museum. Now, you have to understand that today was my day. We were seeing things that I had always had an interest in seeing, but never was able to. All three of us had been to Philadelphia before. We have already seen Independence Hall (awesome) and the Liberty Bell (ho-hum). So, since we’re in Philly, I decided to check out some off-the-beaten-path stuff today.
If you don’t know, the Mutter Museum is dedicated to medical oddities. Strange stuff. Some might say, gross stuff. I had first heard of this place from a show the boys and I used to watch called “Mysteries of the Museum” (or something like that). I noticed that often, some of the items discussed on the show were on display at some place called the “Mutter” (pronounced moo-ter). I studied up on the place, and found that I was fascinated at the strange things they kept there. This was our first stop.
The Mutter is a depository of birth defects, catastrophic injuries, and other abnormalities of science. Doctors from around the world still come here to study and learn about the rarest of rare conditions, ailments, and injuries. To prove this, a couple of items usually on display were unavailable because they were being studied.
Now, unfortunately, pictures are not allowed through most of the museum. Here are some of the things we got to see, but that I don’t have pictures of:
- The skeleton of a 7′ 6″ man standing next to a three and 1/2 foot dwarf
- The “Soap Lady” – a woman whose body had not decomposed due to the perfect concoction of soil, bacteria, and weather, and whose body was now preserved as some sort of cheese like consistency. Sounds gross but it was fascinating to me
- A body cast of the original “Siamese Twins”, Chang and Eng Bunker.
- Slices of Albert Einstein’s brain, preserved on microscope slides
- The colon of a man who had a serious case of constipation (it was the size of a medium sized dog – the man died from it)
- A 74 pound ovarian cyst removed from a woman in 1865
- A two-headed baby preserved in a jar
- A case containing 139 skulls from all over the world
- A shrunken head from a tribe in South America
The museum was hot and crowded. This being Saturday, and during a heatwave, it made sense. Nonetheless, I could’ve stayed longer, but Nathan had had enough. “Too weird and gross,” he said. “I’m ready to go.” Poor guy, tried to indulge dad, but got grossed out. I sent him out to the lobby while I perused a couple more items, but I could’ve stayed much longer. If you are fascinated by medicine and the evolution of it, then this is the place for you!
The next odd stop for us was the Eastern State Penitentiary, located right in the heart of Philadelphia. First opening in 1829, it was the largest, most expensive structure in the United States at that time. Among it’s most notorious residents was one Mr. Alphonse “Al” Capone.
Outside the prison, it looks like a castle. The brick walls rise 30 feet into the air. There are crenelated parapet battlements which look like archers should be stationed at, aiming down at the enemy. It is quite an imposing sight. And then, right across the street, a pizzeria.
The prison was unique in its design. From a central hub, prison blocks protruded like spokes on a wagon wheel. Inmates were confined to their own cells. The main focus was on reform rather than punishment (it didn’t always work that way).
The heat today made it a test of endurance to go through the entire prison. Free water was given out, and there were a couple of exhibits which were in air conditioned rooms. This helped a lot. Fans were also present at certain places. Still, everyone was wet with sweat (not just the fat people like me).
It was an audio tour (narrated by actor Steve Buscemi), and the voices of actual inmates (some are still alive – the place didn’t shut down until 1971) made the tour very memorable. They really made it so that you could see what they were talking about.
The prison fell into disarray after it closed, and it wasn’t until after 2003 that visitors didn’t have to wear hard hats to tour the facilities. Nathan found this place “much better than the other one,” and I have to say that I really enjoyed this stop.
Well, that’s it or today. Tomorrow we travel from Philly to Providence, Rhode Island. Our focus will be on visiting a couple of famous authors, and hopefully a trip to the candy store…you’ll have to come back tomorrow to find out more! Until then, stay safe. And to my peeps in Hawai’i – keep up the good fight! Just say “No” to the TMT!
The Great American Road Trip 